Saturday, October 14, 2006

Game 4 ALCS

Running diary of Game 4 of the ALCS.

430 Hey, the game is to start at 4:35 and the first pitch is thrown already. Have to love that Jason Kendall is leading off for the A’s. Maybe not, since he was struck out already but that is so Billy Beane. Putting your catcher leading off because he can walk.

432 I have always been a big Mark Kotsay fan. One of the best defensive rightfielders in the game when he was a Marlin and now that he is older, he’s playing a mean centerfield. Not something you see often, a guy shifting to center late in his career.

434 Milton Bradley up. Who is the best Milton in the history of the game? Thompson? Pappas? Eric?

435 Gerald Perry is the hitting coach for the A’s. There’s a guy who should have hit a lot better than he did. Nice mechanics. Fun player. Fifth in the league in batting in 1988.

437 Oh my! The Athletics score first. Granderson couldn’t catch up to Bradley’s double. Granderson is one of the worst looking fielders I have seen in some time. Always seems to break the wrong way and then have to catch up to the ball. And now Big Frank is up. If he were with the White Sox, he would draw a walk in this situation. No, I’m not bitter.

441 Oakland’s trainer looks like the manager from Major League. Just had Bradley move some whitewalls to loosen up his leg.

443 Big Frank fouls out and goes back to the dugout. Looks a little perturbed but still mostly composed. Pat Burrell drives me nuts with that. Strikes out and goes back to the dugout and tears everything up. Uh, Pat. Ease up. You strike out in one-third of your at bats. It’s the most common outcome of your playing baseball. Get used to it. You act like maybe your emotions aren’t under control. Like maybe you have heightened anger resulting from some sort of chemical imbalance in your body.

444 Get rid of him. Eject his ass! I hate fans who lean over and grab balls in play.

446 Lou Pinella doesn’t know what a GED is and he was going to replace Torre.

448 Brandon Inge should get a Gold Glove for this series. Great stop down the line and a cannon throw. Beaut. A-s up 2-0.

452 Dan Hairy-N on the mound. Looks like he got out of bed about the time Big Frank was up. Note to the A’s pitching coach….the mound is 60 feet six inches from home plate. Not 58 feet. There’s more bounces coming from A’s pitchers than Tigger.

455 Keys to the Game. A’s: Just win. Tigers: Do what you’ve been doing; win. Great analysis.

457 Ordonez stole Bonderman’s hair and glued it on to his. No other reason to explain the constant camera switching from Mags to the dugout and back and forth. Haren 24 outs away from a no-hitter.

502 Some play needs to be named for Marco Scutaro but I don’t know what. He just bounced to first on two pitches. Should that be it? He Scutaroed for the first out.

503 There should be a play named for D’Angelo Jiminez, too. I don’t think we can convince people to change the word out to D’Angelo Jiminez, though. He just grounded to second for the third Jiminez of the inning.

505 My roommate had bedbugs says the WebMD ad. Like to see the posting for that: Roommate wanted. Female, non-smoking, quiet. Must have bedbugs.

506 Creepy. A guy in a Tigger outfit in the stands on the cellphone. Must be the A’s pitching coach making a call to the bullpen.

507 Shhhh. Mike Maroth is talking about the weather. I’m glad they mic the players so I can learn more about the intricacies of the game.

510 Showing Gomez’s home run from earlier in the series. Says “There was very little doubt about that one.” There’s something for the Elias folk. Doubt percentage on home runs. So Taguchi had a Doubt Factor of 97 on his home runs. Big Frank has a Doubt Factor of 17. Gomez breaks up the no-hitter, damn it.

511 Haren throws a 37 footer for a wild pitch. Making Rick Ankiel look like a control pitcher.

512 WebMD ad again. Mom talking to her kid. “She had an ear infection…a double…was it a double ear infection?”. Yeah, come on 7 year old kid. Keep your Mom posted on your health. She’s obviously too busy to remember whether you had one or two ears infected. Leave her a message on her cellphone, please.

519 Big Frank 0 for 12 in the ALCS. He’s no Placido Polanco, that’s for sure.

521 Next half inning I’m going to note every company I see a product or ad of.

524 Curtis Granderson just looks awful. I’m looking forward to Cameron Maybin replacing him in a couple of years. Lou Pinella talks about the illusion of the strike. Billy Beane on phone to David Blaine.

525 Haren throws a fastball right down the middle for the K

527 Not buying a Chevy Silverado anytime soon. Not sure any of these companies have ad execs who have received their GED’s. Idiotic is about the best way to describe some of these ads.

528 And the Turkey Hill Advertising Half Inning begins. Chevy. Budweiser. Fox. Comerica. MLB. Gatorade. AT&T. MGM Grand. New Era Cap. Jeep. Comcast. Verizon. General Motors. All companies or products viewed in game. Ridiculous.

530 Jay Payton crushes a ball for a homer. Doubt Factor 1.

534 Geez. Inge fields a ball on the second base side of the shortstop. He rocks.

540 56 major leaguers whose first and last names end in o

541 Ken Macha described as meat and potatoes and hailing from Pittsburgh. When will we hear about the sushi guy who hails from San Francisco?

542 Wonder how many bilingual switch-hitters there are in the majors.

544 Guy holds up an “eat ‘em tigers” sign. Taco Bell should hire him.

552 Kendall finally makes contact. Of course the contact was “Hey, I’m facing a major league pitcher because I’m here at fantasy camp and by golly, I’m going to get some wood on it one way or another”. Pathetic roller to short.

552 Where’s the AFLAC trivia question?

553 High fly down the right field line. Ordonez, Polanco and Guillen converged. I half expected Inge to come out of nowhere and make the play. Trying to think if there’s anyone who could rival him for favorite third baseman status. I like Rolen a bit. Zimmerman. Crede. Wright. Cabrera. None of them really grab me.

558 And Inge leads off the 5th with an infield single and takes second on third baseman Chavez’s throwing error. Inge would have made the play.

600 Granderson at the plate with man on third. I wager Granderson does not score him even with Oakland conceding Inge on a ground out. Why are they playing J. Geils’ Centerfold at the stadium? Lost my wager and he stretches it into a double. The Maybin Watch is put on hold.

604 Granderson struck out 170 times this year. The Maybin Watch continues.

605 Payton misses the dive and Monroe doubles. The Detroit crowd is alive for the first time since Kendall struck out to lead off the game. If Payton pulls up and plays it safe, it’s runners on the corners.

607 Line out double play to kill the crowd and the inning.

608 Plaque bugs? Plaque is really microscopic insects? I just don’t know that you can call a unicellular a bug. I hate advertising.

611 Frank Thomas’ favorite Halloween costume is a wrestler. Fascinating.

612 Some announcer points out that Thomas walks on four pitches and Chavez swings at the first pitch and almost hits into a double play. Not very smart. And then someone else, probably Lou without his GED, argues that it’s not a bad thing.

613 Bonehead mixup at second prevents a DP. Is it just me or does Nick Swisher look like an asshole jerk? I’m not one to judge on physical appearance but I just get that vibe.

617 Just got an e-mail reminding me that my all-time favorite horse, Hunca Munca, is running in the Maryland Million Distaff Starter. C’mon Hunca!!!! Even if the race is over already. I’m rooting for you. She was the second favorite on the morning line at 4-1. 13 horses in the race. Mile long. I don’t like it. I like her getting free early and it will be hard.

619 Mags showing himself to be the better former White Sock (than Thomas). Lines a homer, Doubt Factor 13, into the left field corner to tie the game

621 Guillen lines a single to right. Haren not fooling the Tigers at the moment. And that’s it for Haren. Macha not taking any chances in this all or nothing game.

625 Joe Kennedy in to pitch. One of my favorite ex-Devil Rays. There’s J. Geils band again. It’s like they think it’s Charge or something.

626 Chavez almost blows a play that Inge would have turned into a double play.

627 Guillen takes third on a wild pitch and is praised for his aggressive running. Of course, if he was out, he would have been criticized. I hate advertising.

629 Out to talk to Kennedy with Inge up. Inge is called “a dangerous guy”. He rocks, I’m telling you. Though that goofy facial hair thing costs him some fan points. They’re throwing to him. Kennedy bounces the first pitch. The wonderful things about A’s pitchers are A’s pitchers are wonderful things. They bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy, fun, fun, fun, fun, fun. But the most wonderful thing about A’s pitchers is in three more innings they’ll be done.

631 Inge walked intentionally after some bad pitches.

633 2-2 on Santiago. Biggest pitch of the game right here. “Fouled away, we’ll do it again”. 2-2 on Santiago. Biggest pitch of the game right here. “And another foul ball. Pretty good battle here.” 2-2 on Santiago. Biggest pitch of the game right here. Ball way up in the strike zone. Full count to Santiago. Biggest pitch of the game right here. Fly out to left. Inning over.

635 I can’t believe they had no trivia question in this game. That’s an advertising opportunity right there. I even referred to it earlier as the AFLAC trivia question. It’s ingrained in my head.

639 What Devil Rays players have gone on to play in a World Series for the World Champion team?
Albie Lopez (1998-01) – 2001 Diamondbacks (.1 inning, 27.00 ERA. 0-1 record).
Bobby Witt (1999) – 2001 Diamondbacks (1 inning, 0.00 ERA)
Jose Canseco (1999-2000) – 2000 Yankees (1 AB)
Geoff Blum (2004) 2005 White Sox (1 AB, 1 HR)

Not feeling real good about Joe Kennedy and the A’s.

641 Jiminez is called Jiminez on strikes.

644 Kendall finally gets a hit by bouncing a shot off Bonderman’s foot. Piniella informs us that Bonderman goes “Ow!”. That’s it for Bonderman.

645 These weird cartoon ads for Charles Schwab. Don’t get them. Did I mention I hate advertising.

649 Kotsay crushes a ball just foul.

653 Granderson leads off. Shows bunt after a ball. 1-1. Not feeling good about him. Fouls off another. You can hear the crowd. MAYYYYYYYYBINNNNNNN. MAYYYYYYYBINNNNN. Lou says Granderson is playing with a lot of confidence. Hits a long fly the other way to the warning track but it’s a Jiminez.

658 Polanco shows that there is such thing as clutch, baby!!!! The real players step up in the postseason. Did you know Polanco is a career .300 hitter in the regular season? I sure as hell didn’t.

701 Kiko Calero pitching. Wow. Three of the 56 career guys with o at the end of their first and last names on the field right now. Marco Scutaro at short. Calero pitching. Polanco on first. For future playoff reference, the Mets have Julio Franco and Pedro Feliciano. The Cardinals have Davido Ecksteino but he doesn’t count.

704 Ordonez walks to load the bases. One out. Here comes Huston Street to lose the game. He’ll K Guillen but then Pudge will hit a two-run single. That’s what I’m feeling. I’m feeling all the gushing comments on Pudge being a professional and how he came to the Tigers and they lost 91 games. It’s just needed. What can you say about Carlos Guillen?

707 Jeff Suppan vs. Steve Trachsel is the pitching matchup tonight? Ugly.

708 Fouls off the first pitch. Street pausing to step off the mound and collect himself. WOW! An Ingelike play by Chavez. Fields the grounder, steps on third and throws to first to end the inning. Did not see that coming.

709 Hunca Munca went off at 5-1…..AND WIRED THE FIELD!!!!! WOOHOO!!!! Very nice!!!

712 Milton Bradley making his case for best Milton with a base hit to left.

714 Big Frank continues to be hitless with a double play ball. And Milt Pappas is not a Milton. He is a Miltiades. I can say without a doubt he is the best Miltiades ever to play baseball. Eric Milton is the only Milton to be an All-Star (disregarding middle names).

715 Jason Grilli throws four straight balls to Chavez. Does Payton have another homer in him? Not feeling it. Which means he will hit one. Ball one.

718 Two balls and Pudge goes out to the mound. 3-0. The announcers are talking about the A’s inability to play “smallball” as the source of their not being able to win in the postseason. Craziness. Eight straight balls for Grilli.

719 Swisher is up. Ball nine. Ball ten as Pudge shakes his glove at him. “Oh, throw the ball to where you put your glove.”.

720 Ball eleven. Ball twelve and the bases are loaded. There’s a mild booing. If this was in Philly, Grilli would have been hit by a battery by now.

724 Ledezma throws the first strike in ten minutes. Wow. Scutaro fouls out to end the inning.

729 Street gets a really iffy call on the outside of the plate. Most questionable call on the night and then Pudge gets punched out on a checked swing. More ugliness.

730 Both teams have walked five times tonight.

731 Wow. Another bad pitch call. This one below the knees. Fatigue settling in for Meriwether. Another strikeout for Street.

732 Inge at the plate. Can he follow Hunca Munca’s success? Nope. Grounds to short. Which means Kotsay will have to win it in the top of the ninth for a favorite to win the game for me.

737 Kielty, a switch-hitter, hits a pop fly for a Jiminez. The A’s have 5 switch-hitters on the team right now. Bradley, Swisher, Jiminez and Melhuse are the others.

738 Kendall gets a real, honest to goodness base hit.

739 The 2001 Phillies were the switch-hittin’est team of all-time. A dozen switch-hitters. Of course, five were pitchers. Talk about a useless skill. Being a switch-hitting pitcher. I hit equally poorly from both sides.

740 Kotsay down in the count 1-2. C’mon, Mark!!! Flies Jiminez.

743 Milton hits a shot that the wind looked like it might carry into the stands but Mags makes the play on the track. Still tied at 3.

746 Granderson up with one out. MAYYYYYYYYBINNNNNNN!!!!

747 Have you noticed I like Cameron Maybin a lot?

748 They throw up a figure that Huston Street has thrown more than an inning eleven times this season. That’s like saying Takeru Kobayashi has eaten more than two hot dogs five times this year. It should not be a big deal for a pitcher to get more than three guys out. That’s just sad.
749 Milton runs down a ball in the gap, hobbling all the way, to put Granderson Jiminez.

750 Base hit as a tiring Street serves up another hard hit ball.

751 Polanco hits a hard single to right. Piniella names Polanco his MVP of the series. Even though we could have four games to go.

753 Mags hits a homer with a Doubt Factor of –37. Series over. You can give your MVP to Polanco now, Lou.


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